Menstrual Cramps, FML.

     Today marks the day of my week-long battle with dysmenorrhea, for the 123654789th time of my life. I hate it. I freakin' hate it. I hate people when I'm having it. The world probably hates me when I'm having it, because apparently, I turn into a monster. My mom even told me, "Para kang naglilihi," because I am like a woman in her early stages of pregnancy who eats a lot and lies down and gets angered and irritable easily.

     At exactly 2:34 pm today, I discovered that I got my period. First thought was: "Heyyy you are a tad bit early," #IrregularGirlProblems. Then came "Damn, my classmate asked for my emergency pad yesterday." So I had no choice but to go out and buy one from the nearest convenience store.

     Then I had to still go to class. I was feeling very very uncomfortable because (1) I was not able to wash properly, and the wet wipes just won't cover the uncomfortableness of your first day. (2) The room was soooo cold with its full-blast air conditioning. Home girls will understand me. (3) The cramps are starting to claw their way out of my abdomen. #exagg

     After class, I figured that I should probably buy coffee to at least make me feel better. It worked for a short time. Coffee is my life, so yeah. Drinking my coffee to-go, I started heading home. It's a Saturday, so I was hopeful that the traffic in U-belt is much more forgiving than the regular school days. It's not. The traffic was merciless. So was the dysmenorrhea.

     I live in Pasig, so the commute from U-belt was quite long. Half-way home, I started to feel uneasy. At first, I thought it was brought about by the cramps. But then it's like the cramping feeling is moving from my lower abdomen to my whole abdominal area. It could probably be because of the period, and then it dawned on me that I had a huge cup of coffee. With milk.

     I felt kind of gassy, but of course, grace under pressure (after all I was sporting a good MAC lipstick color a while ago so it would be very wa-poise and dyahe if i farted like a man). I was sweating beads and I swear deep inside I was panicking because the pain form the period was intensified and I was scared that i cnnot control the urge. Lol, I survived. It was very hard.

     Bottomline, I hated this day. I am writing about it because I am setting the bar on the FML moments. I hope it won't go any higher than this.

The Truth About Commitment

  I am not good at being on the other end of commitment ropes. I have broken quite a lot of promises, and I have tried to avoid certain circumstances for my own comfort. Not cool. But then, there’s this line:

“If you can’t hang then there’s the door, baby.” (SWS, 2011)

  Probably not the best line to quote for this topic, but hey, this is my blog so fock uff. First of all, I am not a stayer. I am a leaver, I admit. But I really think that staying in a relationship just for the sake of hanging around and eventually being annoyed with each other is not the way to go. If I don’t think the relationship is giving me what I deserve, then I leave. It’s just the same thing as the way that I expect the other party to not settle for my shortcomings. Life is not a battle of who stays or who goes, it’s about who gets to be truthful about their feelings.

  If you’re happy, you stay. If you’re not, you leave. There’s no such thing as an in between, where you suffer and ignore.

Barbara Conklin | P.S. I Love You

My mother made me do it.

It almost made me feel bad that I have given such a low rating, given the reviews and all, but still.

I give it a 2.5 rating -- and I have contemplated for a little while if I should round up or round down. There is no way that I am giving it a 1-star rating because I'm a sucker for summer flings and whirlwind romances.

I wasn't even planning to read this one because it looks like a really really old and corny romance pocketbook. And helloooo? The cover. The model just looks so sad. Ha, kidding. But seriously.

My mom posted this book on facebook, telling me that this was the first book that gave her the "kilig." She. Posted. And then there came the comments (by her batchmates, of course) about how much they loved this book when they were younger, how they tend to hide a copy in the library shelves just to be able to continue reading the next day... It was funny. And it got me curious.

P. S. I Love You  by Barbara Conklin When her father left after the divorce, Mariah lost her sense of family. Now she's lost her special summer, too. Instead of fulfilling her dream to become a writer, Mariah has to help her mother with a house-sitting job in very rich, very snobby Palm Springs. People with a lot of money make Mariah uncomfortable. Until she meets Paul Strobe, the rich boy next door. Paul's not a snob and he doesn't act superior. In fact, his sandy sandy hair and piercing blue eyes break down all Mariah's defences. With Paul, Palm Springs becomes the most romantic place on Earth. But Paul has to go into the hospital for some tests and then an operation. He's seriously ill and all his family's money can't help him. Will Mariah lose Paul, too, just when she's found her first love?

So not judging the book by the cover (yay, me!), I gave it a shot. I got the e-book copy and I doubt that there's still an available, physical book, and I'm not sure if it's available anywhere [amazon or what] because girl, the book is Jurassic.

May I just say... P.S. I love you. Yes Paul, I am in love with you too. You're another addition to my literary crushes because (a) you're artistic and capable of creating something, (b) you're tall and such a cutie, and (c) you're rich [lol no just kidding] you're deep and humble and funny and generous. This guy, ladies and gentlemen, is the epitome of a perfect summer crush.

Dear Mariah, you're young. For goodness' sake, you're 16 so there's no way you cannot move on from that loss because hello, you've been with Paul for like 10 weeks (60-75% of which, he's at home or in the hospital being sick) and tbh with that time frame I doubt there will really be a "falling in love" that's going to happen. So yeah, I like it that you made him your inspiration and decided to move on with your life. Good job girlfriend!

Early into the book, I've had a few "awwe so cute" moments, and that was probably because of Paul-Kim (little sister) moments. It was quite short so not very much of a bother to read but all in all, it wasn't something that I would recommend reading, although all my mom's friends are telling that IT'S THE BOMB I mean seriously? Lol. I didn't relate at all. Butttt mom said it was a romance novel for early teeners, so maybe that's why. (BUT MOM!! SWEET VALLEY!!)

But, I think re-publishing these Sweet Dreams Romance Novels will bring nostalgia to those 80's babies. I mean, they're the workforce today, so, $$$. Just sayin'.

P.S. I am in love with the idea of snail mail.